Being back in Tokyo I have the funny feeling of retracing my steps, familiarity, revisiting and accidentally looping back
Here I sit in Shibuya not far from where I went at the beginning of this trip. I have crossed that crossing amongst the masses myriad times. I have yet to be robbed.
The main thing I misplaced was hostel keys. This is unsurprising.
I packed the wrong things. I was awkward at times. I have been tired, as ever reminded that my body is not as it once was and that it’s limits are always there awaiting me, reminding me that I am finite and fragile.
I worry about how I am going to travel in the future, but overall I feel good. As good as I can possibly hope for.
That anxiety and fear is gone. I am safe, this is nice, I am enjoying it. I settle into things.
I also have nothing much to steal. Enough to buy a 7/11 dinner and transit fare to the airport.
The main thing to worry about now is my flight. I check the time over and over in the hope that the triplicate events in my phone (generated by some sort of email thing not me) are in fact real and right, that I am not as ever messing up and getting the details wrong. Something to work on. Trusting myself, trusting that things will work out, that I can be safe and okay.
I am content. I am here in this moment. Savouring what remains.
It is a new era in Japan today, an exciting time to be in this country. We have walked past lines at shrines and it has gotten me thinking about the way we mark changes. Endings. Beginnings. The new year. The new era. Look forward to the future with hope and possibility. Ready or not here we come.
So I have been strolling the hills of Tokyo and thinking of my blessing for a new era, in the style of Harry Potter and the Sacred Text. I don’t know how or if this is a thing people would do in Japan but I think the sentiment in enough. I go to the shrine by my hostel and stand in awe and hope that maybe the health will rub off on me.
I write this on a stoop as rain falls softly beside me. I am content. My body is tired, the good kind from lots of walking. My wrist aches, the bad kind of pain that scares me and makes me wonder about whether I can do things I care about. My sleeves are rolled up slightly and I am excited to spend the night reading a book that fills me with delight.
So a blessing for the new era:
May I be kind and patient. May others be kind and patient with me.
May we take care of each other. May we think more of beauty and joy and less of money. May we put well-being first and foremost.
May we remember that no matter how many iThings we create we are still merely creatures, that our lives and bodies are fragile and precarious.
May I remember to enjoy what I have while I have it. May I remember to enjoy the people who are in my life while I have them.
May I be wise enough to ask for help. May that help be available when I ask for it.
This whole spring thing is distracting.